My Tales of the rails is retired

Hello all, if you follow this blog, please check out my new blog as I will not be posting here anymore.

If It's Unladylike, Fattening or Fun, I'm In!

Hope you like it as much as you like this blog.

I also have a website: Today's Grab Bag

I get it you are tired...but really!

This guy thinks it is ok the sleep on the head rest of the person in front of him...me! Which I find wrong in so many ways. First of all he is leaning so far forward that no one could possibly sit there without having him breathe down their back. Secondly. When I did move to give someone a seat, he put his head back down and pulled on my hair while doing it. Lastly, it is plan rude and feels like your head is on my shoulder and you are not even cute.

American Idol night on the train?

Ok where are the cameras? Who are these people? First a guitar player doing a horrible rendition of a Santana song and now there is a chick on here singing at the top of her lungs to some song on her iPod. Wish I could attach the video I took. Must be a full moon the crazies are out.

Electric shock???

Some days when I'm riding the train the is a person that stand in between the doors so they can't close. Even when the metro operator say please release the doors they don't. I am not talking about the people who run through the doors trying to catch the train. But those people who just hold the doors for countless others who are walking casually like the train is waiting on them. So I think that the operator should be able to push a button and send a nice electric shock into the door holders. Just a thought.

The Week Magazine taught me this

The first step in confronting a problem, I'm told, is to admit you have one.  So let's go on with it: I suffer from Pedestrian Aggressiveness Syndrome.  LOL this was a statement made by the editor William Falk.  Funny thing is I suffer from the same problem!  People with PAS walk on crowded city sidewalks in very brisk and directed manner, and have zero patience for those who dawdle or, worse yet, stop short to read or respond to a text.  When they do impede our progress, we dodge among the dawdlers like a halfbacks, muttering insults and fantasizing about violence. This last part is not me, no violence, but the muttering. LOL.  At times, we even display "a mean face" as we rush past.  So true, shame on me...or wait and you guys too!  I know there are some of you out there that do the same thing.

One is never cured of PAS, of course one can only enter into a process of continuing recovery.  In that spirit, it might help us if the dawdlers, fellow pedestrians, followed some simple common sense rules.

1. Please note the sidewalks are like highways, and they have lanes.  Ok maybe they are not marked by while lines,m but there are lanes nonetheless.
2. Do not drift across the sidewalk without checking over your shoulder.  Your are very likely in my way.  
3. Do not stop short, like a car suddenly braking in traffic, every time some pointless text or tweet or call pings your phone.  Pull over to the side. Or something awful might happen.

I might even display my "mean face" and we both don;t want that to happen do we?

I thought this was funny and quite fitting for the blog and we do this on trains too.  LOL

Are your eyes broken?

I am guessing they are because there is a sign right in front of you that says "No Loud Music". Maybe you are one of those people that think the rules don't apply to you. You are above it all. Wow, I love myself but I know I am no better than everyone else. The worst part about it is your music is very offensive. There are children on this train and they don't need to hear that stuff.

Oh look you turned of your music, did you know you were being written about? Thank you for the peace and quiet. By the way if you music wasn't so loud and obnoxious I wouldn't have minded. Nor would i have written about you.

Fake Reporter

So today I had the urge to be a fake reporter.  The whole train was packed like sardines and people were standing all over the place.  There was this one lady sitting all by herself in one chair and her purse was getting a nice ride in the chair next to her.  Here is what I wanted to do, yes I had this whole conversation in my head this morning.

"Hi, I'm writing a story about the Metro where I will be talking about the people, the schedules and all the strange and wonderful things we see daily.  Would you mind if I asked you a few questions?  No, great.  So my first question is do you take the train daily?  Ok great.  So tell me do you purchase one or two tickets every day? Oh really only one, hmm.  So my final question is then if you only buy one ticket everyday how come you feel like you deserve to take 2 seats daily while 10-20 other people are standing the whole time?  Yes, I am serious.  No I am not actually writing an article I just wanted to meet someone who felt like they were better than other people and deserved to have to seat. Thanks and have a good day."

Short and Sweet

Today someone sat on me.

The end

Thank you

Dear Metro Driver Mike,
Thank you so much for stopping the whole train for me this morning. You are super duper.

Hello honey...

Hi honey, hey I will be home later then usual. I feel asleep on the train and I missed my stop. Yes I feel asleep. What? It happens. Said the 30 something robust lady in front of me on the train. The best part is she must be lying because she was no where near the station stops she said she slept through. Lol

Elevators? Yes I am adding elevator stories to the blog.

But before I do that I have to mention that I an currently on the train listening to the conversation of two drag queens. Lol pretty darn funny, but you really have to be here to truly appreciate it.

On to elevators. Here is a little background:my current office building at the Times has 10 floors and I am on the 9th. Though there are days that I actually walk up or down the complete 9 floors, most days I take the elevator. It seems that I have become an elevator snob. Let me explain that. I have started to think that all elevators should work up and down like they do but they should not be able to only go up one or even two floors. Yes I realize that there are people in this world who are unable to walk up or downstairs, but those are not the people I will write about in this here blog.

Elevator post #1- the other day as I was on the elevator making my way down to the first floor, the elevator abruptly stopped at the 2nd floor where a very health looking man stepped on to ride the ONE SINGLE FLOOR DOWN. My only thought was REALLY? You waited longer for the elevator then it would have taken for you to walk down those what 10 maybe 12 stairs to the first floor. Bitter elevator rider party of one is here! Good times. Good times.

Da train, da train!

Sometimes I just want to stand on the top of the stairs at the blueline and call out "Da train, da train." Then when everyone looks at me I'll say "Smiles everyone...smiles!"

Wow all that just came out and I haven't had any coffee yet.

Where the heck am I?

You just never know what your week has in store for you. I am currently on the green line and I have had to most amusing time. First I am witness to a near fight between some young black girl who thinks she's all bad talking crap about a man with only one eye. She us not trying to be quiet at all. Little did I know the man with one eye is sitting 5 rows back of me. It got very loud and the girl all of a sudden, though she was screaming was not so brave. Well this steaming match went on for two stops. When the man got off and the doors were safely closed she then started talking all kinds of crap. Funny how the doors closed and no way for her to get the crap beat out of her gets her some balls.
Once that girl and her friend leave at that next stop, this guy a few rows behind me starts talking all kinds of crap about the young man that was with the loud girl. I won't repeat his comments but let's just say he was extremely homophobic.
It is just so sad to me that people like that feel the need to speak. I realize there are times we all think mean thoughts about other people but do they have to be verbalized? Think before you speak. I guess that is too much to ask some people. I admit I am guilty of this as well. Ughh to be a better person takes hard work.

Manic Monday

Ok so technically this did not happen on a train, but it is too good to pass up.  I just walked by a homeless man dancing around and singing "Just another Manic Monday"

My thought is that most days are pretty manic for him, but he sure looked happy.

ICE BOX

Dear Metro Driver, it is currently 56 degrees outside but it is 30 degrees in this train. I can see my breath. Do see any problem with this? Guess not.

Huh?

I am looking at a guy in front of me that has a piece of tissue rolled and stuck up his left nostril and is rolling a dubie in front of everyone. Too funny. Oh and it is 61 degrees outside right now but it is 30 degrees in the train. I swear I can see my breath.

You're a what???

So I am minding my own business waiting on the train platform for the greenline when this older man dressed in jeans and an old t-shirt gets up in the face of the guy in front of me and asks him a question that I can't hear and moves on. I of course think the worse, like he asked if he wanted to buy some pot. Lol. The same man walks to this other guy asks him a question then grabs the guys arms pulls them behind him and starts to search the guy. Another man about the same age as the man searching the kid is standing right there like he was the guys partner. People start staring when we finally see they are cops. Haha. All I can say is wow I would never had thought they were with the police. I feel a bit more secure about riding this thing especially since you never know who is watching you. The homeless looking man in front off you could turn around and flash a badge then give you a ticket for eating, drinking or riding without a ticket. Just FYI, it is not a real stretch though to think he was trying to sell weed, I've seen it before. In fact I am rarely surprised any more what people try to sell on the metro.

Wonder what they call me???

As you all know I take public transportation 5 days a week to work, normally it is the Metro - Green/Blue/Subway.  I am pretty consistent on which trains I catch as well.  My schedule does not vary much so this give me an opportunity to run into the same people daily.  Some of you may know that on the trains people rarely talk to each other unless they are riding together.  It is very unlike the Amtrak where people used to strike up some pretty good conversations with me.  Most of the time I hide my face in a book or now my Kindle and just read.  But of course what true good people watcher totally turns off their radar.  So daily you see the same people walk on and off the train and it is kind of like you are friends, except for the fact you don't know anything about them.  So of course I give them all names, makes them a bit more special to me. LOL.  Here are some of my favorite friends:

The Cryer - this is a blond lady that I've seen crying a few times.  I've prayed for her and told her I hope her day gets better but I guess when you need to cry you need to cry.  (sidenote - I cry all the time...just rarely on the train.  LOL)

The Rude Guy - this is a balding guy that pushes his way in front of the door as is pulls up to the station and can't wait for people to get off because he wants a seat.  I have never seen him give his seat up to an elderly person or a female.

The Humble Homeless - This is the very sweet homeless man that I give money to most of the time.  On time he sat down with me and told me about how much he used to like to read and write poems.  He also told me that he can get a big bowl of grits for $1.75 that will last him for the whole day.  He then recalled that his grandma used to make him grits when he was little after church on Sundays

The Cute Family - This is a couple that I have been seeing almost daily.  When I first noticed them I thought how sweet, this couple works together and rides the train daily.  What great quality time.  Months later I thought to myself WOW I wonder if I would still take the train daily if I was the pregnant.  Now I think how adorable they are with their little girl in there arms every morning taking her to daycare by their work.

The Pen Seller:  This a homeless lady that carries huge duffel bags of "stuff" and as she walks down the aisle she knocks people on the head.  She then stands at the front of the car and says "Excuse me ladies and gentleman, excuse me ladies and gentleman I am selling pens 3 for $1.00. They are good pens. 3 for a $1.00."

There are so many more: Lady who reads out loud, The Gum Snapper, The Sleeper, and of course The Train Inspector.  If I see all of these people and many more daily and have named them, or recognize them my question is do the recognize me?  If yes I wonder what the heck the call me.

Sincerely,
The Lady with her face stuck in a book who is not really reading or is she????

The sleeping, talking to herself, and wearing latex glove lady

So today on the train home a little asian lady sits next to me. She immediately closes her eyes and starts to mumble to herself. Then it gets louder like a chant. She stops adjusts herself and goes back to sleep. As she is dosing off her phone goes off, when she goes to reach for it I see her white latex gloves. Hmmm I hope she not preparing herself for any exams. Lol.